Emotionally Focused Therapy
In working with couples I primarily work with Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy (EFT). EFT is a highly researched model that focuses on building a safe and secure attachment bond between partners and is shown to be effective for reducing the relationship distress.
Based in Attachment Theory, EFT recognises that attachment needs, fears and longings are a fundamental part of the human experience - When those attachment needs are met we feel seen, valued and strong in ourselves. But when our needs are missed by our partner it creates pain that hits deep in our nervous system.
Neuroscience shows that no one is unaffected by the pain of not being 'got' by our partner - and it can bring out defensive responses that can look like conflict or emotional distance. We all know these moments when arguments happen that roll without resolution or when we shut down and feel alone.
I know you're seeking couple therapy because you love each other, but as is the case with all of us, sometimes the defensive cycle that comes out when things are hard can get on top of us. I help you and your partner when you find yourselves in this space.
Using EFT I want to help you both to slow down and explore what is happening for both of you in these difficult moments and help you to share it in a way that your partner will hear. When we are stressed we often express defensive emotions - anger, withdrawal, distance. It becomes harder to be vulnerable with our partner. But if we can learn to recognise and share the deeper emotions that speak to our love, ours fears and our need to be close, this sharing in itself strengthens our loving bond and can create lasting change to our relationship.
In couple therapy, this is what I will help you to do.
Please reach out if you are interested to know more.
Based in Attachment Theory, EFT recognises that attachment needs, fears and longings are a fundamental part of the human experience - When those attachment needs are met we feel seen, valued and strong in ourselves. But when our needs are missed by our partner it creates pain that hits deep in our nervous system.
Neuroscience shows that no one is unaffected by the pain of not being 'got' by our partner - and it can bring out defensive responses that can look like conflict or emotional distance. We all know these moments when arguments happen that roll without resolution or when we shut down and feel alone.
I know you're seeking couple therapy because you love each other, but as is the case with all of us, sometimes the defensive cycle that comes out when things are hard can get on top of us. I help you and your partner when you find yourselves in this space.
Using EFT I want to help you both to slow down and explore what is happening for both of you in these difficult moments and help you to share it in a way that your partner will hear. When we are stressed we often express defensive emotions - anger, withdrawal, distance. It becomes harder to be vulnerable with our partner. But if we can learn to recognise and share the deeper emotions that speak to our love, ours fears and our need to be close, this sharing in itself strengthens our loving bond and can create lasting change to our relationship.
In couple therapy, this is what I will help you to do.
Please reach out if you are interested to know more.
TOGETHER STRONGER STRENGTHENING RELATIONSHIPS
0435 624 786 counselling@togetherstronger.au
0435 624 786 counselling@togetherstronger.au